Green Cinderella: proof that shoes can change your life

Just Keep Swimming

Song of the Day: Funny the way it is by Dave Matthews

Ever since I was laid off in May I have been trying to figure “it” out. “It” being, where should I go now that I can go anywhere? Charmoné is mobile and so am I. I’m soooo free and so lucky, but with that freedom I feel a responsibility to use it as best as I can.

Initially I promised myself that I wouldn’t worry for at least 21 days. And I didn’t. In fact, I sort of extended that through the end of June without any problem whatsoever. I was a rock-star non-worrier. I visited Minnesota, New York, and Colombia, and just figured an obvious answer as to where I should move next would magically appear.

But so far, no magic. More questions than answers. The past week I was starting to feel a lot of pressure to make some big decisions. I’ve taken a lot of time to think and talked to a lot of people, but the best advice I got so far came from watching Finding Nemo with Lauren and her family: Just Keep Swimming. Lauren has been saying that for a long time now but I never really internalized it until I saw the movie. I didn’t even really expect to like the movie, let alone find a profound message in it. The point I took away was that even when you don’t know where you’re going, just keep going. Don’t overanalyze. Don’t worry. Just put one foot (or fin) in front of the other.

Some people would argue that you must have a destination or you’ll end up no where. In this case, I think the “destination” is just knowing the kind of life I want and the kind of people I want to be around, and trusting that I’ll land where I’m best suited. And that might not be one place. At this point in time I honestly do not know where I’ll be after August 2, but I have figured out a few things. I figured out that I can be happy anywhere. I can find both comfort and excitement anywhere. What I most want to find now is the place where I can make the most difference- where my skills, creativity, and spirit are most useful to the people around me. That perspective changes my entire view on things, so we’ll see where I end up next month. Until then, just keep swimming.

The Ugly Truth

Song of the day: Violet by Hole

I spend most of my time trying to radiate positive energy. And having a socially conscious business with very grateful customers often puts both Lauren and I in a peaceful, polly-ana-ish mood that is reflected in our designs. Our design esthetic is definitely ethereal and feminine. Part of this is driven by our personalities and part of this is in direct rejection of the masculine or sensible styles that many people expect to find in eco-friendly, vegan shoes. And in our marketing, we tend to keep it light and reject any kind of “angry activist” message that is sometimes associated with green or vegan causes. 

But despite all this goodness and light, sometimes I succumb to what can only be described as infantile rage. And although it’s historically made me uncomfortable (does not compute with Minnesota nice), I am starting to learn to channel it appropriately and see the value in anger… if it’s used to ignite change.

In truth, I rarely get angry with another person. Usually my anger is directed at myself for either not having enough patience & faith (being in a hurry is not a good idea when it comes to any kind of fashion manufacturing) or not having enough discipline (like the 5,436 calories I ingested at Lauren’s 4^th of July party. UGH.). Fortunately a good workout dissolves most of it and I can quickly make peace with myself. 

The kind of anger I am learning to deal with now is that larger anger at “society.” The underlying frustration that comes from being a woman in America- incredibly, undeniably lucky and yet still unsatisfied with the status quo and disturbed at the images dished out by pop culture. And it switches into both rage and sometimes helplessness when I think about the conditions faced by women in other countries. But that’s not useful, so in hopes of channeling this appropriately, I’m providing a small list of things we women (and men!) can do to help make society better for all of us. These issues range drastically in terms of gravity, but all the actions are focused on bringing women UP and supporting one another… while hopefully eliminating some of the anger and helplessness that affects many of us:

1)      Stop putting unreasonable demands for youth and beauty for women. Not only do men get more of a free pass when it comes to aging, but they are also often easier on us than we are. Don’t spend your time tearing apart other women (people usually do it to famous women, but sometimes its stretches into people you actually know) and commenting on how they need to lose weight, get botox, get some sun, etc. Focus on what’s beautiful about every woman you come across- famous or not, young or old… including yourself.

2)      I know many people find it a light escape, but I’d love to see a mass movement where people stop watching reality shows that encourage women to behave... well drunk and slutty. It’s a horrible message to be sending to girls- “you too can become famous by selling yourself out on TV!” While I know most people don’t take it all that seriously, the ubiquity of the ‘girl-who’s-famous-for-no-reason’ has got to go away. (I have to admit it would be tough to stop watching Talk Soup though. We’re all human. And Joel McHale rocks.)

3)      On a much more serious note, get educated about what’s happening to girls in other countries and do what you can to help. If you haven’t heard about the “sex tours” that take place in Asia and parts of Central America… well it’s about as bad as you might imagine. Here’s a few sites to get you started- and we are just getting started in seeing what we can do to help as well.

http://www.worldvision.org/content.nsf/learn/globalissues-stp

http://www.ecpat.net/EI/GetInvolve_speakout.asp

4)      Help another woman avoid above fate by donating to an organization such as:

a.       Women 4 Women

b.      The Girl Effect

 
And lastly, stop judging the women in your life for the choices they make. Whether it’s the choice to have kids or not, to stay home with them or work, to get married or not, whatever it is… stop judging… just support. We are way too hard on one another. Get angry, do something about it, and then go back to being your sweet/sassy/sexy self. Here’s some other songs to inspire you:

Right Through You

Don’t Let Me Get Me

Just a Girl

The Secret to Partnership Success

Song of the Day: I Can Tell That We Are Gonna be Friends: White Stripes

When we started our business, one of the things we heard most often was to be careful of partnerships. The standard advice is that they don’t work. And while I know there are hundreds of examples of failed partnerships, I can say without a doubt that I wouldn’t want to do this any other way.

I first met Lauren while interviewing her to be my boss at a software start-up in Silicon Valley. She was being brought in by one of the top executives and it was pretty clear that my “interview” was just a courtesy gesture to make me feel like I wasn’t totally unimportant. As I scanned her resume, I thought, great, this chick is going to be totally harsh. After all, she was from New York, had an MBA, and had come from a few companies famous for having cut-throat environments. Your basic nightmare.

But then I found a gem at the bottom of her resume- she went to F.I.T. While this did not ease my concern of her being a scary harsh New Yorker, it did pique my interest and give me something to talk about during the faux interview. I was surprised to find someone that was not only smart but also hilarious, easy going (who knew New Yorkers could be mellow?) and all-around wonderful. Even when the company we worked for was going down in flames, she always had a positive attitude, made the best of it, and most importantly, made me laugh. 

It’s those same qualities that have made our partnership so smooth. We laugh through EVERYTHING. The truth is, I never really wanted to start a business, I just wanted to work in fashion. It was Lauren that had the idea to make vegan shoes, and it was Lauren that made the idea of starting a business fun. I started doing research and found that while vegan shoes already existed (I really thought she was the first person to ever think of this), most were not eco-friendly or sweatshop-free. Or stylish. Seeing a hole in the market and feeling a pull towards creating something both fun and meaningful, we jumped in and haven’t looked back since. We’ve had an incredible amount of ups and downs since starting Charmone, but one thing I can rely on is that ever-present sense of humor and even-keel attitude. Not only does having a partner make the ride a lot more fun, collaboration creates more ideas and momentum than I would ever be able to create on my own. I think if you’re both committed, always give one another the benefit of the doubt, and set aside ego, partnerships can not only work but be more rewarding than you ever thought possible. Here's a pic of us laughing our way through a Chinese New Year party at London Fashion Week!